I Like Fairies

Genius.  That's all I can say about my wife's most recent parenting tool, fairies.  No, not those fairies (not that there's anything wrong with that).  We're talking the come-in-the-middle-of-the-night types.  You know, like the Tooth Fairy.  My wife has perfected the use of these mythical entities to manipulate our 6-year old when all other non-confrontational efforts fail.

For instance, we had a big bowl of candy left over from Halloween and we're duly reminded about it every 20 minutes.  Obviously, we don't want her pining for it over the next several weeks.  And it's not like we can just toss it out.  We'd have a mutiny on our hands.  So, what does my wife do?  She creates the Candy Fairy.  As explained to our child, you simply leave your leftover candy at the foot of your bed the night after Halloween. The Candy Fairy will come while you sleep, take the candy, and leave you a special surprise in return (in this case, $1.00 and a piece-o-shit Halloween glow stick).  Worked like a charm.  Kid goes to sleep...candy goes in the trash without incident.  Perfect.

Of course, now I'm going to being whipping fairies up left and right.  I'm already on track for the Old Shoes Fairy, the Estranged Polly Pocket Pieces Fairy and possibly the Rotted Plastic Kitchen in the Back Yard Fairy once I work out the logistics.  Your mileage may vary.

Posted by Whiffleboy