Bowzer Would be Proud

If you've got an infant at home, you're probably intimately familiar with the challenge of getting them to sleep.  Personally, I stare at my daughter like she's from Mars when she fights nap time.  Think about how awesome it would be if every two hours you were required to nap.  Is she insane?  Granted, I realize how much better being asleep is than being awake at this age, whereas awake time for her is all toys, attention, and pissing her pants.  Not a bad life.

What am I on about?  I wanted to share a nifty trick I've use to get our daughter to sleep that's almost fool-proof...if you've got the pipes for it.  No matter how inconsolable she gets, I can almost always get her to calm down and pass out by holding her and singing in the deepest voice I can muster.  You don't even need words...substituting "bum bum boom boom" actually works better.  Being a manly man with grizzly-like chest-hair, I can generally muster something resembling a deep tenor or baritone, which seems to work better than my wife's valiant but feeble attempts, which sound more like "A Whole Lotta Yoko" than Barry White.  Some tunes I recommend:

1. Theme from "Raiders of the Lost Ark"
2. "Don't You Want Me" (Human League)
3. "Peace Frog" (The Doors)
4. The allegro from Vivaldi's "Four Seasons"
5. Theme from "The A-Team"
6. "Rubber Biscuit" (Blues Brothers version)
7. "Are You Gonna Be My Girl?" (Jet)
8. "Under Pressure" (Queen...yeah, you heard me, Ice, I said Queen)
9. "Cannonball" (The Breeders)
10. Any song heard in a 70s porn movie

If you're particularly adept at this, you may be even be able to use my secret weapon--Tuvan throat singing.  I'm sure the Tuvans would pole-axe me if they knew I was butchering their native music, but if I get up to her ear and make that sustained belch-like sound, she'll freeze in mid-cry and you'd think she'd just been anesthetized.  It's a neat trick.  Try it at home!