Dontcha Wanta Wanta Santa?

"Do we tell Cheeky about Santa?"

I glanced up from my extended proof of the Riemann hypothesis.

"What?"

"Santa.  Do we tell her?"

Our daughter is two and a half, and blissfully unaware of the universe.  She believes that unlimited cookie supplies can be accessed via a space-time vortex in our kitchen cabinet.  She's thinks Mr. Sun goes to sleep at night, and shitting yourself is perfectly natural. For her, life has a romantic simplicity achieved only by poets, hippies, and Nell.

My wife had posed a simple question:

Do we perpetuate the myth of an obese toy-maker living on an ever-shrinking ice cap who delivers branded merchandise to millions of wholly undeserving children all in one night, yet still has time to simultaneously squat at every local mall in America for days on end, with 15 minute breaks to swig Olde English 800 from a paper bag?

Or do we raise an enlightened post-modern child, sparing her the eventual disappointment of a lie exposed and us an extra $50 a year on gifts from a fictional character?

I'd actually never considered the possibility.  As a kid I'd always been skeptical of the concept, and when my Mom accidentally mentioned that she'd picked up the Death Star Playset Santa brought me on sale at JC Penneys I felt vindicated.  It didn't lessen my enjoyment of the Rankin-Bass Christmas specials, and having three younger siblings meant that if I promised to keep my mouth shut I'd still get extra loot from "Santa" anyway. 

Why even bother with my daughter?  She doesn't know or care.  She's smart, and would probably figure out it was a giant scam by kindergarten anyway.  Wouldn't I actually be a cooler parent by being honest with her?  And I'd never have to put on a stupid red suit and a beard.  Bonus!

"Yeah, we should tell her about him.  Isn't that what's great about being a kid?  The magic of Santa?  Besides, all the other kids are gonna be blabbering about it...why should she be left out?"

Pretty short argument, and a no-brainer in the end.  If she's living in our house she'll probably end up a jaded, cynical humanist anyway...why not give her a few years of untarnished mystery and imagination first.  What harm has ever come of it?

"OK.  How about Jesus?  Do we tell her about him?"

"Not now.  Too confusing.  Besides, what's he got to do with Christmas anyway?"