Small Change

His voice, so much smaller than his overgrown 7-year-old body, stabs my ear like an X-Acto knife.

"Dad," he says, "can I have a nickel or a quarter?"

I've just dropped 500 -- and change -- at the dentist on you and your sister, you little dip. That brings the total to nearly $900. In the past week! Yeah, insurance is gonna pick up the bulk of that tab, but sweet Jesus, I'm PISSED. We were half an hour late to the flippin' appointment today which, yes, balances out the 45 minutes we were early last week but I'm losing my effin' mind here with all these motherfletching drop-offs, pickups, play dates and lessons all summer long. And there's six damn weeks left.

Urrr. Brain hurts. Brain hurts. Brain hurts.

I can't keep anything straight. Must be the heat. A month of solid rain and now it's finally hot outside. I'm sweating and in need of the shower I skipped in the rush out of the house this morning and I'm tired and I'm horny as all get because, well, I am, you know, and I am frayed to the last thread in this rapidly unraveling rope that is my day. Now, YOU have the nerve to "nickel or quarter" me? Me?! For what? Some crappy gum you'll spit out in 30 seconds because it loses its flavor after second 28? Another bouncy ball that will roll around my car until the dog gets loose and then I have another vet bill to pay? What the fuck, dude? I let you little parasites badger me into an early lunch at this fast-food hellhole because "waah, the sealant on my teeth tastes icky" and this is the goddamn thanks I get?

Just.

Piss.

Off.

I sigh, "Man, what can you possibly need a nickel or a quarter for now?"

He turns and points.

On the counter, behind him, reflecting the florescent glow from somewhere above, is a box. It's clear plastic sides show off the many coins and dollars already collected.

I close my eyes and massage my forehead.

The cashier hands me my change and I fish out a nickel and a quarter for him. He slips it into the box, not knowing that the big sister standing next to him, the sister he will bicker with in the car a few minutes later, was one of those very kids who had benefited from others, like him, who gave to Ronald McDonald House.