The New Nissan Sedans - A DadCentric Review

I spent a recent weekend hanging out at Nissan's San Diego headquarters driving fast and taking chances.  I had to sign waivers.  I think.

The good people at Nissan flew me to San Diego, put me up at the W Hotel, fed me some fine grub and invited me to test drive their new line of sedans.  No money changed hands.  I didn't even tip the bellhop.

Let me preface this review with a bit of personal history: My dad was a Datsun man and that led to his becoming a Nissan man because something happened behind the scenes that we weren't privy to, possibly someone named Datsun dying at the hands of someone named Nissan followed by maniacal laughter and lots of files being sealed. Possibly.  Or maybe there was a buyout.  What the hell do I know?  The point is, I spent many a chore behind the wheel of a Nissan truck and I resented them accordingly.

Secondly, I used to have a Sentra back in "the day" and in said Sentra I had some of the best car "dates" ever.  It was epic.  Submarine races in a starlit desert.  My old cassette player should be bronzed.  My old back seat should be in a museum.  Old girlfriends should friend me on Facebook.  My Sentra experience canceled out a youth spent loading and unloading exercises in futility.  

I took Nissan's offer knowing damn well that we were even.

First, my favorite: The 2010 Altima Coupe.

Yes, it's not a sedan and it's fantastic.  I say this knowing that a) it would be a terrible car for a family, b) I couldn't even get one leg into the back seat, and c) at 6'3" my head touched the ceiling of the cabin when I found the seat position I deemed most comfortable.

But it was powerful and fast and the interior was red leather and I found Led Zeppelin on XM just as I opened the sunroof and turned the corner that placed the Pacific Ocean square in front of me.  The Altima Coupe isn't a car, it's a freaking time machine - the cool rocket kind, not the one that looks like a sleigh.

Could I see myself behind the wheel roaring down life's highway?  Only from Mozambique to those Memphis nights, the Khyber Pass to Vancouver's lights. 

Could I get two car seats in the back?  Hell no.

The Altima Sedan was also nice - in a relative, more practical sense.   However, when it came to the sedans I found the Maxima to have the most room and the most power, which is good.  It also came, as many of the cars did, with a rear camera for all of your backing and safety needs.  The first time I relied on it I ran over a cone, but hey, they're just co-ens. 

In all honesty, I didn't really see much of a difference between the Maxima and Altima other than the overall size, and, of course, the price tag.  When the latter is figured into the equation the Altima moves to the top. I'm a fickle reviewer and a frugal bastard.  Hello, it's a recession, people.

The Sentra was fine, but truth be told, I couldn't really embrace it.  Maybe that's because I was in the front seat.  Maybe it's because its lack of legroom made me feel suddenly fat.  Maybe it was the absence of anything resembling power.  I don't know, but while I could easily suggest the Maxima and/or Altima with a clear conscience I wouldn't feel as good endorsing the Sentra.  It felt like an afterthought.

And then there was the Versa.  I didn't expect squat from this little, um, squatty car.  I almost didn't drive it, hoping instead to take the coupe for one more spin down roads free of stress and the confines of reality, but I figured Nissan had been an incredibly gracious host and it would be a disservice to them and my journalistic integrity to skip it.  Besides, there was a line for the coupe.

There were two Versas in the lot.  I chose the hatchback as it was the one I wanted to mock the most.  Hatchbacks.

I sat in the front seat and made myself comfortable.  There was a surprising amount of headroom.  Leaving the seat set to my frame I checked the legroom in the back.  Shut. The. Front. Door.  There was more legroom in the back seat of the Versa Hatchback than any of the other cars.  I couldn't believe it. 

I started to rethink my rather harsh first impression.  I checked out the trunk.  The back seats folded down to allow enough room for a good trip to IKEA.  There were air vents in the back, which the dogs would love.  Also, groceries.

I took it for a spin.  It wasn't the Maxima.  Hell, it wasn't even the Altima.  Yet, it had power.  It had spunk.  It was, dare I say, fun.

And then the day was over and I had a plane to catch and stuff to think about.  Lots of stuff to think about.

Here's what I thought:  The Nissan Versa Hatchback is a great family car.  Who knew?

Nissan did.