DadCentric

A Completely Biased "Review" Of The Excellent Parenting Book Minimalist Parenting

When my friend Asha Dornfest asked me if I'd like to review Minimalist Parenting, the new book that she co-authored with Christine Koh, I laughed in her face. "Review? No. I'm not gonna review your book. I will, however, endorse the shit out of it, because I'm sure it'll be awesome."

See, the word "review" implies that there's some professional objectivity on the part of the person writing the review. There's none here. I've been a big fan of Asha's for a while; her site Parent Hacks is one of the absolute best how-to sites for parents out there. She and I have been Internet pals for a few years, and when we finally met face-to-face at the Dad 2.0 Summit earlier this year, it was like bumping into a buddy who I hadn't seen in a couple of weeks. So, yeah, I was predisposed to be completely biased in regards to Minimalist Parenting. Fortunately, I don't really have to be. The book is full of extremely useful tips, strategies and advice that Henry David "Simplify! Simplify! Simplify!" Thoreau himself would've doled out (well, except for some stuff about social media, because Walden did not, as far as we know, have WiFi). Featuring contributions from parenting bloggers, Parent Hacks commenters, and real-world parenting experts, the book is a quick and easy read - and dads will appreciate the emphasis on gender/role neutral advice and the liberal use of the word "we" in reference to who exactly does the parenting work around the house. 

So there's my "review". If you'd like a more polished, professional, and neutral take on Minimalist Parenting, may I suggest noted Atlantic writer Andrew Hinds' piece on the book, which recently appeared in the New York Times' Motherlode blog. You can trust him. He's a professional.

Oz the Great and Powerful Review

I have spent some time in the Emerald City. I have eased on down the yellow brick road (below). I have paid attention to the man behind the curtain. I know from Oz.

What I did not know was what to expect from Disney's Oz the Great and Powerful. The original Wizard of Oz film is, obviously, a classic, and on top of that it is tied for FAVORITEST MOVIE EVER (with Mary Poppins) on a list of such things as compiled by my youngest son. Needless to say, the movie had some big ruby-stained footsteps in which to follow.

And so it was, two weeks ago, that we went to see Oz the Great and Powerful on the Walt Disney Studios lot, which is something akin to Oz in its own right. It was the night of my little boy's birthday, a full day of seven under his belt, and he had so many wishes waiting to be granted. I really hoped that Oz could deliver.

S Gifts and Contest: Sol Republic & Shellback Rums

It's been a long time since I did a review post on something that was sent to me. But, when I was offered a pair of headphones to try out, I couldn't pass it up. When I was deployed, I had 'phones with me all the time: a pair of Skullcandy in-the-ear for the gym or surfing the web at the MWR; a pair of collapsible Skullcandy over-the-ear for watching movies or listening to music in my cell room. They were a "must have" accessory. But, at the same time, that environment is hard on them. The only set I have left that made it out of counrty are my Skullcandy Skullcrushers. So, when I received an email about trying out a pair of Sol Republic Tracks, I figured, what the hell.

Disney's Wreck-It Ralph: The DadCentric Review

I don't remember my age at the time, but I was young—third or fourth grade, and I could see the entire neighborhood reflected in the glare of the wood-framed television in front of me. I was sitting alone on a bed of orange shag carpet, and the gathered crowd cheered behind me as I did what they had come to see: I flipped Pac-Man, hitting a score so high that the game reset it to zero. For a brief moment I was a hero, and video games would never be the same.

The title character of Disney's latest animated feature Wreck-It Ralph (John C. Reilly) has spent decades longing for that feeling. He has played the same game, Fix-It Felix, countless times for countless days, and he has never known the accolades of his neighbors or appreciation for a job well done. He has performed his duties without fail, and it has brought him nothing but long trips down and endless holes of mud to land in.

Ralph is a character in the Fix-It Felix video game, and during arcade hours he does what he was programmed to do: wreck it. Unfortunately for Ralph, the game is not about the glories of wreckage well done, but rather Felix (Jack McBrayer) and his impressive ability to fix the path of destruction that has been created.

Players maneuver Felix to mend an apartment building immediately after Ralph shows up to vandalize it for no apparent reason, although the judgmental socialites that live inside seems like a good one.

Wreck-It Ralph is a bad guy, and he is tired of it.

On Frankenweenie, Kids, and the Benefits of Fear

Here we go again — another family movie opens with bits of fright and scares, in this case Disney's latest Tim Burton offering, Frankenweenie, and parents come out of the woodwork with their torches, pitchforks, and assorted cries of woe.

"It is too scary," they say, or some version of it, and that might be true for their child — fair enough. Things are scary, kids vary, it happens.

However, this is a tale as old as time, and from the first bite of a poisoned apple to the dark curse of angry bears, Disney has been at the forefront of scaring audiences, often filled with children, because fear itself is something worth fearing.

It is my opinion that children need to develop an understanding for the emotions that come with fright just as much as they need feel the pangs of anger, humor, and sadness. That is not to say that I promote scares and tears as par for the course, I prefer the sounds of laughter, but at the same time I believe I am doing my children an injustice if we avoid the dark arts altogether.

Obviously I cannot speak to your children or family situation, but fortunately this space allows me to discuss mine, so humor me:

My wife and I are raising two boys fueled on imagination and emotion — to the point that I sometimes worry about the innocence that they carry. They are both very bright, and they easily excel in academics that are aimed at children much older, but they are noticeably sensitive, overly sweet, and socially naive compared to others in their respective grades, and while this was brought about through careful intent — a constructed world to cherish childhood to the fullest for as long as humanly possible, it is also cause for concern. Are they too soft for a world so hard? Are they too sheltered and unprepared? Are we doing it right?

I don't know.

An Ode to Old Shoes

I bought you at an Off 5th in Nashville during the late summer of 2008, just a few days after buying your twins on zappos.com, but you were cheaper and could readily be placed on my feet, so I sent your twins back when they arrived a few days later.  I finally had summer shoes that weren't flip flops or those stupid-looking mandals the guys in jean shorts were wearing.  You said "Braves games" to me.  "Neighborhood grillouts."  And "casual Friday."  I knew we were in for some good times.

I took you to Chicago the following summer for some conference filled with women.  I dragged you onto a stage to dance to Tone Loc.  I think we were a hit.

 

Several months later, I was waiting on the elevator like I do every morning.  My hands were full of briefcase, extra redwell, water bottle, and lunch.  The elevator door opened, and I stood fast, so that the guy who'd gotten there first could enter first.  He paused, pointed at you, and said, "After you. I gotta defer to the Jack Purcells."  You beamed.

Spring 2011, you were with me in New Orleans for another conference filled with women. A friend named Britt introduced me to a lady named Karen who takes lots of pictures and writes books.  She complimented your contribution to my "look."  You delighted in it.

By Spring 2012, you were looking a bit ragged, but I took you to a Jimmy Buffet concert with a friend I've had since 1985.  As I was returning with yet another handfull of beers, someone stopped me on the lawn. 

Him:  "Hey, what color were those when you first got 'em?"
Me:  "Greenish...I think...it's hard to remember right now!" 
Him:  "Those are cool as shit, dude.  Keep wearing 'em.  Keep wearin' 'em forever!"

But then, this happened:

And it became apparent to me that your time had come.  Four wonderful years had passed, and you no longer protected my toes from puddles.  With every step, your bottom pulled away from your body and dragged the floor after each rising step.  I thanked you for your loyal service and then ceremoniously lowered you into your final resting place.

But I never forgot your sacrifice.  And when the time came to seek a replacement, I kept it real, and I kept it Jack Purcell. 

Rest in peace, greenish Converse shoes. May you be ground into a bouncy surface beneath the jungle gym at an urban playground or something. 

Ice Age 4: Continental Drift — The DadCentric Review

Ice Age 4: Continental Drift is (obviously) the fourth in the animated Ice Age series following the adventures of Manny (Ray Romano), Diego (Denis Leary), and Sid (John Leguizamo) as they bond in ways that society frowns upon (e.g., multi-species herds are for hippies) and find like-minded characters to expand their group of mutual respect and friendship. As far as cartoon messages go it's a good one.

It starts, as it always does, with Scrat (Chris Wedge) the saber-toothed squirrel and his obsessive passion for the elusive acorn, which, as you may recall, he has been chasing since the big bang. Per usual his pursuit has world-changing consequences — namely the creation of the continental plates and their subsequent drift, hence the title of the film. (Note: Some of the scenes are a bit dark and intense, but like a storm at sea that you are watching from a dry, comfortable seat, they pass quickly.)

In all of the the confusion/danger the guys are separated from Manny's wife (Queen Latifah), daughter (Keke Palmer), and as an added bonus, land. Together with Sid's cantankerous Granny (Wanda Sykes) they set out to find their loved ones and something solid to stand on. Also, pirates.

The humor is consistent with the rest of the series in that it balances between the cheap, crude laughs (farts, snot, etc.) that kids love, and some pretty funny nods to pop culture, parenting, and life in general.

There are also a number of PSA/messages woven into the plot that deal with being true to oneself, the importance of family and friendship, and other chestnuts that parents love to talk about on the car ride home.

The cast list is fairly impressive and features the likes of Drake, Seann William Scott, Jennifer Lopez, Joy Behar, Nick Frost, Simon Pegg, Patrick Stewart, and DadCentric favorites Peter Dinklage and Aziz Ansari. Friend of the show Ashley Albert (The Jimmies) also lends her voice to the film, which is really cool. (Note: Nicki Minaj also provided voice work and was, in my opinion, the most annoying aspect of the movie, grating on my ears like fingernails on a Spotify suggestion. Your response may vary. On the bright side, that may be what they were going for, in which case Nicki Minaj is a genius.)

My boys found the film to be very entertaining, and I laughed heartily more than once (no, I wasn't drinking). Overall, Ice Age 4: Continental Drift is a nice way to get out of the heat and share some fun with the family. It is sure to delight the kids, most parents, and all fans of the franchise and/or plate tectonics.

Ice Age 4: Continental Drift opens Friday, July 13.

My boys and I attended a free media screening of the film for the purpose of this review. Photo courtesy of FOX.

Twins Happen: A Review of Double Time

A thousand years ago, when my wife and I discovered that kid #2 was going to be, in fact, kids #2 and 3, I reacted in the calm and composed manner of any self-respecting man-about-town: I more or less fell off my chair, curled into a fetal ball, and started muttering indeciperable obscenities to myself and the base of the sonography table.

(that was a fun day.)

In any case, after we eventually composed ourselves enough to leave the building and face a suddenly and dramatically changed world, we immediately realized there were three things we had to do:

1. Tell Our Families
   Admission: my wife had to talk me into this. I remember driving home from the hospital and my wife saying that we had to call her parents and my parents and.... um... I kind of resisted, in the apparently misguided belief that if we didn't tell anyone, maybe it wouldn't turn out to be real. It turns out: that's not actually a viable strategy. Go figure.
   
   
2. Get A Bigger Vehicle
   This was me shifting into logistics mode. Going from 1 kid to 2 kids is one thing — most four-wheeled vehicles are set up to accommodate such an adjustment. Going from 1 to 3, however, is a different kettle of fish altogether. Can you fit 3 Britax kid car seats onto the back bench of a Toyota Corolla? Maybe you can, but I sure as hell can't. Hence: we needed to go car shopping. (Note: this was, of course, an entirely selfless and family-focused exercise in car shopping. Heaven knows I'd never otherwise take pleasure in such a hunting-and-gathering and test driving exercise.)
   

The Norelco Playoff Beard Challenge - Closing It Out

So as my last post for the Norelco Playoff Beard Challenge - or as my man Greg dubbed it, the Dadcentric Norelco Razor Research & Development Blogging Sponsorship Program, the peeps at Norelco asked that I say whether or not I’m gonna stick with their stuff for face maintenance or go back to my previous way of doing things. The answer is the infamous yes and no. No matter which way I lean, my routine will always be built on a solid foundation of “oh geez, I need to do something about this thing before I walk out of the house.” Even my transition from clean-shaven to bearded a few years back was inspired by laziness. After Son # 2 was born, shaving kind of fell to the bottom of the stack. My wife happened to like the look of me that way, so it stuck.

I can say with confidence that yes, I will stick with their beard trimmer. That thing just rocks on multiple levels. It does great work and it cleans up (most) of its own mess. Like a chef who comes to your house, prepares you a fantastic meal, and then leaves the kitchen spotless – but for your face. If you’re sick of cleaning beard stubble out of the sink, I highly recommend.  

The electric shaver, on the other hand, I probably won’t make my regular go-to. Don’t get me wrong, it works fine, and maybe if I had more face to keep clean I’d use it. But with just neck-beard to worry about, it actually takes me less time to just go old school on it.

Thus concludes the Dadcentric Norelco Razor Research & Development Blogging Sponsorship Program.

This post was sponsored by Philips-Norelco as part of their playoff beard challenge for which I received compensation. The opinions and the hair are mine, the shavers are theirs.

Brave: The DadCentric Review

"If it's not Scottish, it's crap!"
— Mike Myers (who has nothing to do with this film)

Pixar's Scottish fairy tale Brave is their latest addition to an unparalleled canon of movie-making greatness (with the possible exception of Cars 2), and opens tomorrow to lines of children with wonder in their eyes and parents equally filled with anticipation — but also the the reality of having spent $46 on candy and popcorn. Welcome to the show.

I have already written a couple of articles about Brave for other publications, one a quick overview, or an "impression" according to a particularly cutting commenter, and the other an attempt to refute the gender-laden concerns rounding the Internet. Neither of the two posts offer much in the way of spoilers, which was a very difficult thing to do. Not since The Sixth Sense has a film had such an unknown twist play so pivotal to the plot. Whether or not the secret survives after Brave opens in theaters remains to be seen, but I will do my best not to ruin it here (I would also suggest that you steer clear of third-party marketing like the Brave line of toys from Mattel that have featured a major spoiler in their ad campaign for weeks).

Brave is set in the Scotland of old, like "olde" old. Maybe older. The story is an original fairy tale conceived by the first director of Brave, Brenda Chapman, who was later replaced at the helm by Mark Andrews. Chapman was having a battle of wills with her young daughter and wondered what was in store for the two of them. This is, undoubtedly, a pretty common occurrence in the parenting world, but unlike the rest of us Chapman had the outlet of Pixar to express it. Seven years later and Brave is on the screen. And it is breathtakingly glorious.

John Lasseter* has a saying that Pixar films are never finished, they are just released, and while I think that is a wonderful quote, hence my including it here, I feel like the story of Princess Merida, her family and her fate, is very much complete.

The film starts with Merida as a wee lass celebrating her birthday in the company of her parents, the big-hearted King Fergus and the equally loving, but much sterner, Queen Elinor, and the scene works to immediately establish the dynamics and decorum of the family, that theirs is a world of unknown magics, and that there is no lacking for danger.

The danger is pretty scary, and that fear plays a large role throughout the entirety of Brave. Parents may want to prepare younger children for the frights that await them, namely (I don't believe this is a spoiler, but here's a warning just in case) bears.

King Fergus is called the Bear King and for good reason. In fact, the entire movie is loaded for bear, and parents may want to follow suit. There are surprises ahead, and more than one may make little ones (and plenty of big ones) jump out of their plush, reclining seat.

Flash forward to the teenage years and Merida's life has been spent under the firm and controlling hand of the queen, who, to be fair, is doing her duty to groom her daughter in the ways of tradition and what best serves the kingdom. Merida wants no part of it. She decides to take her fate into her own hands.

Then, like any good fairy tale, there is a witch, but unlike Disney's previous incarnations she is not an evil character so much as an ambivalent, magic-pedaling small business owner cut from the cloth of Hayao Miyazaki inspiration. She reluctantly agrees to help Merida change her life.

Miscommunication and misunderstanding do their thing and suddenly the path that Merida has chosen, in this case, purchased, takes a terrible turn, and continues to do so for much of the film. Meanwhile Merida strives to mend the rift that she has torn in the fabric of fate.

The story is engaging, frightening, heartfelt, and funny, and there are lessons ripe for the picking. And during it all the art on the screen is so overwhelmingly perfect that one could easily find themselves lost in a single detail for moments at a time. It happens.

To rank Brave in the aforementioned canon of Pixar greats is a difficult undertaking, and probably unnecessary, but if I were pressed to do so I would place it somewhere in the middle. Frankly, it's like trying to rank Beatles albums or Super Bowl highlights — with the exception of clear cut favorites or the one that doesn't sit right, it is nearly impossible and they all roll into one fantastic blur of cinematic magic floating far above the competition. 

That's not a bad thing.

_______________________________

Brave opens June 22, and is preceded by the short La Luna, which was nominated for an Academy Award. La Luna is inspired by the childhood of director and creator Enrico Casarosa. When I interviewed Casarosa earlier this year he explained that he grew up in a house with his father and grandfather, and that the two men did not get along. He said that he was constantly in the middle. La Luna takes that concept and shoots for the moon. Unlike Brave, I can rank La Luna easily enough, it is by far my favorite Pixar short.

Do you plan to see Brave this weekend? If you do please keep comments spoiler-free!

*We had the pleasure of meeting John Lasseter at the opening of Disney California Adventure's Cars Land, and he is as geniuine of a guy as you will ever meet, which is why I cannot resist sharing these photos of Mr. Lasseter and my boys: Atticus and Zane. Thanks for humoring me!