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“I like to walk around my house naked, to remind my oldest son who’s still got the biggest ding-dong.” – Tracy Jordan

Tracy Jordan gets it. It is relative.

He’s a dad in his early forties. He loves his wife, Star Wars and his kids. Tracy Jordan has two boys, Tracy Jordan, Jr. and George Forman Jordan. Theirs is a relationship of give and take and mental instability. The mental issues tend to fall heavily towards the father. Tracy Jordan is under a lot of pressure.

But he loves pressure. He wants to take it behind the middle school and get it pregnant.

Tracy Jordan is a thinker. At one point, when Jordan was convinced that his sons were trying to kill him for his fortune he did what any dad would do, he brought home Japan’s best-selling Tracy Jordan sex doll “… to use as a decoy. So my greedy children will murder it and I’ll be able to escape un-Menendezed.” His survival skills are well-honed.

Tracy Jordan is understanding. When the sex doll plan fell through and it became apparent that Junior and George had no intention of killing their father Tracy let bygones be bygones: “I love you, too, son. Stop it. Stop…patriciding. It’s me. There’s nothing to be freaked out about. That’s just a Japanese sex doll in daddy’s bed. Now you listen. You don’t have to ever worry about me leaving because I’ll always be there to take care of you. And there’s something else. If anything ever happens to me, you, and your brother are going to go to jail.”

Jordan lives a life of love and leisure. He wears his heart on his sleeve, or where his sleeve would be if he ever kept his shirt on.

He wants the best for his children, “If you get rich off this stuff just take care of my family. I don’t want my kids to have to go to college.”

He was fantastic in Werewolf Bar Mitzvah.

Tracy Jordan may not be a role-model, but he likes role play -with models. And he loves his kids which is good enough for me. To claim otherwise is sadder than an owl without a graduation cap. That’s enough to give a guy wife eyes.