In a last gasp of holiday spirit, I decided on New Year’s Day to spare my sister from having to fulfill her earlier promise to take my kids to see Alvin and The Chipmunks: The Squeakquel. I know how she likes to party with Dick Clark every Dec. 31 and I figured she might want to sleep in.

It is with that same warm, fuzzy feeling of generosity that I will attempt to offer you, dear DadCentric connoisseurs of family cinema, a bullet-point review of this much maligned live action/animated hybrid:

The Jujyfruits I bought at the convenience store across the street from the theater and smuggled in were less than half the price of those available from the concession stand.
Jason Lee, who appears in a full body cast in a few scenes in this movie, can still loudly and clearly yell “Al-VIIIIIIINNNNN!” while immobile.
Lee probably received a decent paycheck for appearing in this movie, which should help him out since NBC canceled My Name is Earl, a series in which he wore a 1970s porn ‘stache that was pure awesome.
Lee’s mustache was wisely not cast in this movie.
Speaking of NBC, Lee’s Squeakquel co-star Zachary Levi is excellent on Chuck, which returns to TV on Sunday, Jan. 10.
In this movie, Levi looks a lot like actor Jonathan Silverman, who starred in the classic Weekend at Bernie’s and its totally unnecessary sequel Weekend at Bernie’s II.
The TV show Chuck refers to the Weekend at Bernie’s movies in the Season 2 episode “Chuck Versus The First Kill.” Freaky!
Squeakquel director Betty Thomas shows she is a master of the establishing shot by repeatedly using two of the front of the Chipmunks’ condo (one in daylight, the other at night) so you know exactly where AND when the next scene will take place.
Thomas directed the very funny The Brady Bunch Movie but not its totally unnecessary sequel, A Very Brady Sequel.
The musical numbers in Squeakquel are all songs you should be familiar with so you can sing along during those sequences.
If you close your eyes and listen closely, the sped-up the voices of Justin Long, Amy Poehler, Anna Farris and Christina Applegate (who all play chipmunks in the movie) sound eerily similar.
If, while my eyes were closed, I had fallen asleep, I would have awoken thinking that $7 was a reasonable price to pay for an afternoon nap.
At 88 minutes in length, Alvin and The Chipmunks: The Squeakquel allowed me to leave the theater 5 glorious minutes sooner than I did when the kids begged me a few summers back into taking them to see The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl in 3-D. And, boy, did that movie SUCK!