It’s never wise to put all of your eggs in one basket. Any chicken can tell you that.

Let’s say you do though, and perhaps you don’t want to chance that said eggs wind up poached. Let’s say you really want them scrambled. Maybe with cheese melted on them. No problem. Just pull up to the omelet bar that is a PGD (preimplantation genetic diagnosis) clinic with a fistful of dollars and a pocketful of sperm and you too can play Dr. Moreau.

According to CNN, it is not just the questionable procedure of creating “perfect” babies that is sparking debate, but the slightly more questionable procedure of creating “flawed” babies. Basically, you might want your omelet a little burnt, because a)you like it that way, and b)you’re paying for it. Sure, that might go over okay at brunch, but I can’t imagine justifying the deliberate handicapping of an embryo so that Johnny can have a disability just like mommy and daddy.

Embryo screening, which can run about $15,000 per pop, is usually used to detect any abnoralities in a fetus, which if found is often aborted. That pisses off enough people in its own right. However, the possiblity exists that doctors could choose to fertilize an embryo with defects, should the parent request such a thing.

The examples that some consider as acceptable for tinkering are duplicating dwarfism and deafness. I understand a parent wanting their child to be like them, but why would they deny said child an opportunity to have a healthier or fuller life?

There are many within the communities of dwarfism and deafness, and obviously others, that feel they are not disabled. I respect that. Roll with what you’re given. I applaud it. However, I can’t understand someone that cannot hear wishing the same upon someone they love.

For example, it’s one thing to have known and seen everything about John Lennon, but wouldn’t it be better to hear him than not? We’ve all seen Mr. Holland’s Opus. Music isn’t limited to the hearing, but man, it sure takes it further.

The best quote from the CNN article is attributed to Cara Reynolds of New Jersey, who considered embryo screening before deciding to adopt a dwarf baby.

“You cannot tell me that I cannot have a child who’s going to look like me,” said an outraged Reynolds. “It’s just unbelievably presumptuous and they’re playing God.”

Hello kettle, it’s the pot. You’re black.

How is altering the natural act of egg fertilization the way God wanted it? Just roll the chicken dice like everyone else.

Coo-Coo-Kachoo.

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